Growing up in Hong Kong my family respected all our Chinese idols, especially Kwan Yin the goddess of mercy and also a statue of Buddha. We worshiped our ancestors too. I was taught that our ancestors could protect us and that they are actually God. When I was a little girl, my grandmother and my parents always said, we should worship all the idols and ancestors.
I therefore didn’t want to go to a church or listen to anything about Jesus. That’s because I saw Christians always praying in groups around their church. I thought that these people must be controlled by Jesus, “the devil spirit”, or something else that makes them – in me thinking – so crazy. Besides, to me Jesus belonged to a Western people’s religion. I am Chinese, so Jesus cannot understand me or our culture. In addition, I didn’t believe Christians as they gave their testimonies. I thought they were making up their stories to make me to believe in Jesus.
But, after my parents passed away, my whole world turned upside down. I had no home and no money, and the people I had loved and trusted betrayed me. My own sister abused me for over 10 years. I now wanted to kill myself…
Then I met a Christian lady who provided a wonderful place for me to stay. It was her holiday house and she charged me no rent. I still wanted to commit suicide, but I felt I should not kill myself in the house of this kind Christian lady. She would have a hard time selling the house for a good price if I did that…
I just knew in my heart what they were saying was true. I could feel the love of God in my heart as I listened to them. Because of this love now in my heart, I found myself asking the God of Heaven, “Why do you love me?” I became convinced that Jesus was the Son of God, and not long after that I asked Him to come into my heart!
Before I accepted Jesus, I was a negative person with low self-esteem and very poor self-confidence. I was very shy and would not talk with strangers. If I did talk, my face went red very easily. Now, I’m still a little shy, but I have improved a lot.
I am now happier too and my thinking is getting much more positive. My confidence is also improving and I have hope for the future. No more thoughts of suicide. I feel peace and joy inside my heart. Through my experiences, I know we can ask God to help us as HE is our heavenly father. GOD loves us and HE cares for us.
Would you like to know more? If so, please come along to Global on Sundays at 10.30am and find out more about Jesus and why He is The Way, the Life and the Truth.